A Broken Dream

This dream happened in a flash, like a minute of real time. 

I was sitting at a picnic table, the green ones that are made of metal mesh. He was on the other side, just looking at me. It felt like I’d dropped into the dream mid conversation, and he was waiting for me to respond. His eyes were fixed on mine. My eyes wandered though, scanning his lips and beard, while trying to remember how they felt on my face. His hair was long and lazily pushed back. I wanted to run my hands through it, but I knew how much he hated that. He watched me take him in and started smiling. I’ve never been subtle about my attraction to him, and this sudden scenario was overwhelming. His whole presence was overwhelming. 

Nervously, I blurted out some ridiculous, suggestive comment. Why hide what we both knew I was thinking? He leaned back and interlaced his hands behind his head as if wondering what to do with that. I waited. His knees were just inches from mine under the table and I could feel the space between us charged with electricity. 

“How about….” he started. I was antsy with anticipation. “…we go on a date.”

I’m not even sure I was breathing, “A date? A real date?” 

“Yes,” he confirmed.

My mind started going a mile a minute. A date, like starting over? Like a first date, part 2. Oh my God, what will I wear? I love that pink dress from my birthday that year, wait that was Leslie’s, wasn’t it? I’m pretty sure I borrowed it. Is a dress too much? No way, I’ve got to look hot. 

Stop. Breathe. 

We both got up from the table, and finally there was a plan. There was real hope, real potential for something, for anything. I left to get ready, and don't even remember walking away. I was consumed in my joy and relief. I was shocked and elated all at the same time. God, I can’t wait to tell Karina about this, I thought, laughing. I couldn't contain my happiness.

And then, came the worst part of this dream…. I woke up.